Men Are Human
Inspired by Ron Hudson, somebody I have come to admire.
Men are…?
I had to think about it at first. A woman’s first instinct for some reason seems to want to bash men for all the times she has ever had a broken heart. But I didn’t want to do that, because after thinking about it for a moment, I asked myself why. Why should I be angry for a man hurting me when I have hurt others? Why is it fair of us to expect more of men than women?
I realized that just as we have come to hope and expect women to e 5′8″ tall with 32-36-32 measurements and acne free skin and succlent lips, we have learned to demand more than what should be normal and acceptable for man to be qualified socially as a man.
Societally speaking, men are tough, strong, risilient, infallible, wise beings that are made to protect. While most of these are good traits to exhibit, why are they not real men if they don’t exhibit these things?
Some cliches we are all aware of:
When a man is lost, they have a passionate hate of asking for directions. Why do women force them to? Who is more in the wrong? Women for trying to be controlling? Men for accidentally getting lost? Let’s think. Which is intentional? Do we really think that men ENJOY getting lost just to be badgered by their wives? No, I think not. But, do woman get some satisfaction out of the badgering? Yes. Admit it. Who doesn’t like the opportunity to say “I told you so”? Who doesn’t like feeling that they were in the right?
Going back to the broken heart. if there is a woman out there who hasn’t at one point inher life hurt a man, I’d like to meet her. Men just don’t show it when they have broken hearts so we don’t always realize it. Why would the be? Ponder with me once again. If a man did display his emotions, showed the world that he was brokenhearted – what do we think of them? We think they are not real men, that they need to toughen up. A double edged sword for men.
All in all, the point I am trying to make, the message I am trying to send out, my own opinion…
Men are human. They have emotions and they have a right to them. They have the right to make a mistake. They have the right to be indecisive. Just like women.
Linea Jones said,
July 18, 2008 at 9:07 pm
AWESOME! This was a pleasure to read! Great job!!
Ron Hudson said,
July 18, 2008 at 10:58 pm
GeekGirl611, I commend you for conveying this message because of the courage required to confront societal conditioning. It is true that we men have been wrongly taught how to properly manage and express our emotions. Fortunately, we can be freed from the shackles of the erroneous teaching of people who unknowingly mentored us. The first step is simple, yet profound:
1) Becoming aware: Someone once told me, “Awareness is curative.” Though I doubt years of habitual ways of thinking can be changed simply because we become aware of them. However it is an ideal part of the process of change.
2) Become dissatisfied, disgruntled, and disturbed: People seldom change any behavior, belief, or attitude without recognizing the price they have paid for indulging in them.
3) Decide and commit to experience your God given ability to love as deeply and fully as you possibly can: Undoubtedly this is where both men and women will miss it. The reason is that deeply and fully loving someone requires courage that few of us have. Think about it. In order to love someone you must become vulnerable and willing to risk seemingly unbearable pain.
Why?
We can’t control someone else. What do I mean? Have you ever been hopelessly and completely in love with someone without them feeling same way? Or perhaps you know of someone.
Either way, our falling in love with someone doesn’t ensure that the object of our affection will reciprocate. Does it? You know it doesn’t it.
So what do we do? Most of us settle for safe, close intimate relationships instead of vulnerable and risky loving relationships. The reason we do this is simple.
As human beings, we are driven by two forces: 1) Gain pleasure. 2) Avoid pain. Of the two, pain is the greater motivator!
With that in mind, I challenge you to love deeply and fully anyway because the rewards are absolutely worth it. But don’t take my word for it. Don’t do it for me. Do it for yourself!
Time to go spend time with the love of my life and our four children!
With love,
Ron Hudson
twitter.com/Ron_Hudson